Not gonna sugar-coat this: the New Year looks bleak and dismal from where I stand now. 2015 was going to be the year our baby arrived. Now there will be no baby in 2015.
Please pray for HK as he goes back to work next week. Please pray for me as he goes back to work and I continue to rest and recover. I fear the desolation and the loneliness. I fear the question "What do I do now?" Go back to work-without my baby? Stay home-without my baby? I don't like any of the answers.
Please pray for me in the evenings. My capacity to stay asleep is improving (praise God!) but falling asleep is still really hard and really emotional. Often, I stay up late because I am afraid to go to bed and try to sleep, but staying up late only makes everything worse. I told you there would be no sugar-coating. Thank you for your prayers.
little feet and loving hands
Toby, you are part of our family and we will love you forever.
